Tuesday, October 16, 2007 l
Yesterday's trip back Changi Airport was a filled with emotions and some tears. We shared to each other what we did not like about each other. I told her that i would hope that she would open up to me and tell me when she was feeling sad and depressed, and also like inform me briefly where she is so as to not make me worry too much. She said to me that she gets scared when i am frustrated, irritated, and angry cos she does not know what to do when i am in that state. Well, i basically could not tell her how to react and feel when i am in any of those three situations cos it would be me controlling her and not her usual self. Well, it takes time and there are alot more things you gotta know about my emotions and feelings. Some things can't be simply told outrightly.
Went to starbucks today, met up with Sam and a few of the St. Patrick gang, watched HEROES and read my book till i knocked out on the couch. I was simply too tired....got tempted to smoke as all my peeps there smoke, but i resisted. Thank God. Thoughts on continuing my ambition on writing about my past, but i chose to watch HEROES cos i was too deep in thought. My mind was just thinking about too many things, worrying about her at work and stuff. And, the emo mood never came to me the entire day until the moment i stepped off of 43, and saw that she was not there at the bus-stop. I called her but she sent me the busy tone. So i started walking, and along the way called her again. Got a reply and met her up the street. I so so wanted to hug her at that moment, but she turned away and said not to hug her cos she was sweaty and dirty and stinky. I felt hurt at that point of time but just continued walking. I felt empty, cos i had been thinking and worried for her after she told me the conditions she was working in.
Well, she got worked up cos her dad threw her old pillow way, and replaced it with a new and not to soft pillow. Well, i could tell that she was really angry and pissed with her dad. If i were her, i would have reacted and the same way. I totally know how she feels. Its alright girl, the pillow will be soft in a while, just gotta go ur place more often! HAHAAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!
She is now asleep, and i wanna like leave without her knowing. Yups, i thinks its rather evil but i dun wan her to wake up, cos if she does, she would go online, read my blog and sleep late tonight again. I want her to rest well for tmr. Nights!!!
I don't care and I'm not okay
9:10:00 PM
