I am EMO
so what??
do I look like I care?
NO

IMEEM rocks

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Malia
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Darren

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all over you' :DD

GRRS. thr's a first time in things. not all but most of them (: not knowing how to cope may be one thing, but learning how to is another! cheerios!

anyway, i now know that my mind is capable of thinking so many things, even reflecting in a bus! HHAHHAHA! okay. the thing is that, there are still so many POTENTIAL sheep that can go to Him! but. this excuse, tht excuse,WHY? pride laa and maybe a tinge of stubborness? TSK YR PRIDE MAN! TSK YR STUBBORNESS.

and then i realise i know so little about You and what You have to say to the world and me. i remembering telling You a little something that i feel so even now,when i was lying on my bed yesterday, before i slept.

the physical is so much more reliable and comforting. not saying that You cannot provide me with the sufficient comfort i need and i know i can DEFINITELY rely on You..BUT.. *there always is a but isn't it. how strange. haaas!
yes, but. the comfort You provide seems to be on another level, a level whereby not many can reach, or rather a level whereby worry still exists; just that it's been pushed to the back of the mind when that hope allows us to forget until something or someone pokes it and everything comes back again. but this time, it's kinda different. why? because we got over it already.

but although the physical is much more comforting as in the need for affliation kind of stuff, ISN'T IT AN IRONY that it is SOOOOOO easy to break off from that relationship, or friendship if you so may say.

AND You prompt and prompt and prompt and do it all over, *seems like You never get tired of prompting (: till we are Yours again.

soo.. WHAT NOW?


NAGGINGS ARE IRRITATING. yes i know that too okay. i dont want a dinosaur for a boyfriend. HAHAHAHAH.
" A family, enough to write its own history. "

wow wow wow. do you think so?
Class chalet was great! Really loved the moments we shared as a class during the previous two semesters, and i really dunno what would happen to all of us once we split up in to our individual and different classes next semester. Though my class ppl are not that all enthusiastic and happening as i expected from day one, i kinda grew into liking them for the way they were, they Chinese speaking, the vulgarities that were sprayed from one to another, the racism and the criticisms that we all shared among one another. A lot has passed over the two semesters, my first time actually stepping up to do some credible work in the various group projects, not saying that i am not a slacker nor saying that i do most of the work, i think i kinda contributed in most ways possible, other than my DBIS project which credit goes to primarily SX! Loads of emotions have been experienced and felt over the past year or so with 1E04, and i would treasure the Good moments and remember the not so Good ones for memory sakes, and to learn more of people as i start gearing up for society. Well, i love my peeps from 1E04 and i think that we should cont to meet up in sch or open a chalet in June for another 1E04 gathering.

The chalet was great, other than some cock ups, with the administration dept, some card membership shit which got my pissed. I honestly wanted to just scold the Malay bitch who attended to me. She was so persistent on having my mom come down all the way from work, just to show her Union member card and her IC, and to switch chalet names. FUCK THAT SHIT MAN!! Why must she cause a bunch of poly students so much trouble just to take some time away from our stressed up and hectic school schedule to have a gathering? i think as a senior staff, she can clearly just ignore the membership shit, and allow us in. Totally unnecessary. The next time i book a chalet, i am gonna go down myself to see the conditions of the place before booking. And i must be able to rent a mahjong table, or the chalet should at least have a table for us to but our stuffs on. Oh well's i think i have said my two cents worth of the yucky chalet's facilities!

Well, when we checked out today, baby got suddenly moody with me. I dunno what i did from the moment i woke up till the time we said goodbye and parted ways. I honestly would like to hear from her but i have been calling her mobile but there is not a single response. I am unsure whether she is asleep the entire day or she is simply ignoring me. I think its the first reason, at least i am hoping that it would be the first reasoning. Well, i think i should prob go rest now. Has been a really tiring day for me, and i've got church tmr morning. Looking forward to tmr's meeting with my so called committee for our planning progress on certain upcoming events!!!

TARH TARH!!! =)
rahrahrah! i feel like ranting though it really isn't that essential and important. HAH!guess boredom is in th air man! like most people are either Bs- busy or bored. baby and i? the latter. friends brighten up our lives! :):):) YAYness!

got an invitation to zoom out of the house to get a free jumbo size cup of happiness, love, warmth and friendship! HAHAHHA. it's just an outing with friends la. amazing what words can do to you ;) however, it was declined. WHY? i went sprinting down the lanes opposing the traffic and got my heart all ppumped up, ready to PUKE. hahahaha! maybe not puke but i seriously had a splitting headache man! breathing in too much carbon monoxide already. GIVE ME MOUTH TO MOUTH! (ew. okay. no thanks. ahha)argh. tht headache scared me man. like i could hear my heartbeat echoing in my ears and the wire of the earpiece was bouncing up and down. what a comical sight and i'm laughing at myself. hahhaha. how nice ;)

ran stop walked jog ran stop walk jog

and that was how i exercise, not taking a walk ard my house though it will be great if i could like perspire when i did that. but agn that would be horrible man! it means i have to take showers every one hr tht passed! my skin will peeeeeel man.

had the honour to get TEE out of her hse to catch "skyoflove"!
story plot wasso predictable, just like a chinese composition. like SERIOUSLY man, it's the kind of composition secondary students would write. just like what TEE did loong ago...

thanks babe, for like sitting through the show when you're tired and you need to watch it with sam. (oops.) hahahs! sorry! yr shoulder is greatly appreciated and i like yr DRY shirt. hahahah. all the better for me to make it soaked with tears.

ONE DAY,
i will pull you along with me and we'll walk home tgt. cos i'm aint supposed to do that alone.
hello angry people in the world! you ought to be thankful tht you can be angry okay. so take this time to appreciate you being able to feel emotions and be happy once again! :DD it's okay, just smile. problems wont be solved but you can at least see them in a better point of view.

HHAHAHAH! okay, it's kinda random but i love random posts! tells quite a bit about the person's feelings, i GUESS? anyway, this is my first post! so forgive the randomness okay? hahas, yesyes. i know we all love each other so bear with me here! cheerios! :)

huimin here. yes the huimin. yes that huimin. i was asked to blogggg. heehee. so here goes! my brain is rusty so i can only remember things up to like yest? haha. forgiveness pls?

thought about stuff yest, kinda figured that my life with God aint tht fantastic and i'm supposed to do smth abt it tho i've been procastinating like for so longggg already. *bites myself. sigh sigh sighs. (i'm nt a saddist! and i dont literally bite) back to the thinking, thought about stuffff and gt myself all moody abt it.
rahrahrah. so SILLY. slumped myself near the playground looking at a cute kid running after her dad who was exercising. hahaha! so cute. thn the mystery man came!

the one and only-- my DAAD. -.-

it's was a good thing he didn't see me and went back to the carpark to get smth i guess. but i din want to take the lift up and go home making everyone ard me miserable seeing my longg and banana-ish face! so i decided to go pop by jameszee hse! hahah! more of me who needed some hugs and love :/

the long and cold journey, the strained neck, the thirsty girl, the dark and freaky alleys, the dead silence along the way, the disappointment and lastly the tears.
can you picture tht? hahahah. poor me.

he wasn't anywhr ard his hse, some jalan place which sounded ALIEN to me. wasn't the right time to drop by cos thr were some issues gg on, and the mood he was having wasn't perfect either.

i know the informing part is to like doublecheck in case you're nt ard, but,
question -- AM I SUPPOSED TO STOP THE ELEMENT OF SURPRISE IN FUTURE?

BLAHBLAHBLAH. so i gt my hugs and my love today, but was kinda disappointed nevertheless cos i carried the hope with me tht i could see tht familiar shadow.......

SUNDAY! the start of the FRESH NEW WEEK. WEEEE!
couldn't wait to share my toffee(s) with people! hahah. they are SO GOOD, you just fall in love with them despite having the risks of getting diabeties after eating them ever so often! for example, me. :(
imported from scotland- POPPETS (http://www.poppets.co.uk)

started the day off with a smile, you end it with a smile too!

baby got all sian-ed and emo along the way! making me sian-ed as well. oh wells, we share joy and sorrow rights! hahahah. a lil of ice-cream and a lil of me cheered him up at the end of the day with hi laughing his ass off at, i don't really know what, like he does all the time. HAHHAAH. he's silly but he's my boyfriend and i love him all the same! :DD

walking down the streets, i was reminded of youuu.
I MISS YOU SAM! haha. okay. tho we're nt really tht close but yr presence means smth WHATTTT. :/ enjoy yr trip at phuket! is tht howw you spell it? im nt betraying you james. just showing some affection on yr behalf to yr bestiee! :) if it's coming frm you? it's gay. hahah.

and so, this has been a pleasant trip till now for me despite life giving you more troubles, hohoho. but God is ever ready to receive us into His arms and i'm thankful for that! currently shaking my legs having a load off my head and my back from sch, but students in jcs, pls freak out now if you aren't scoring well and i'll be doing my part praying faithfully for all! :DD
Its been a long 21 days since my previous post, and lots of things have happened over the past 3 weeks or so. A few things that i would certainly remember, would be watching 'leap years' with my best friend Sam and my baby, Huimin. It was a spectacular show that gripped my emotions and eventually sent tears flowing from my eyes, dripping down to my brand new shirt. A few portions of the movie actually happened to me in real life, which is one of the reasons why i could not be man enough to hold back those heavy tears. Baby cried alot too, and i think it was due to the sad portions of the show, and she probably felt how the actor Wong Li Ling played throughout the entire movie.

(special inserts!) nope! ahhahas! it's nt okay. it's all because of all the CORRINE MAY'S SONGS! grrs. but anyway, it's nice and touching. so you can catch it whilst it's still showing! (:

DARN, i think everyone's gotta catch 'leap years'!! The coolest thing abt it was that i caught the movie on the 29th of Feb, which is coincidentally the leap year...

Next thing that i rmb would be the stay over at JJ's house. I arrived rather late, cos i was held back by my FoodMin ppl, we were busy coming up with ideas and designs for the 5 shirts needed for Freshmen Orientation (FO). When i arrived at JJ's house, everyone that was suppose to come was there, and i think i was too enthusiastic to play mahjong that i somewhat forced them into goin up to start playing! I kinda forced them to stop playing 'Winning 11' on PS2, and pulled them to start playing! Well, i sure won't forget that day on the 6th of March, cos i won almost every single game of mahjong at JJ's house. I think if we were playing real money, i would have been rich! (inserts wild laughter HOHOHO!)HAHAS, but the scenario ended up with me not getting any cash, cos they all were short of cash, and i also felt bad taking cash from my closest frens in TP!! (AWWW) After mahjong was dinner, we ate some dishes prepared by JJ's maid, and we all soon went to sit in front of the TV. This was the time i started to feel agitated, cos i dun really fancy watching shows, esp Chinese drama, or Korean drama, or any other movies. But the rest were so interested that they all wanted to stay and watch. I initially thought that we would go back to mahjong after dinner, cos that was what they all said before goin for dinner, so the thought of mahjong was in my mind! Upon finding out that mahjong wasn't in the interest of the rest of my pals, i decided to go find something else to do. I wanted to go and sleep on JJ's bed, but it wouldn't be very nice cos his dad is there and everyone including the host in downstairs, so i thought i could do something with JJ's apple MAC, but soon realised that all his games were gone cos his MAC crashed. I had no other choice other than to force myself to watch some show with the rest or to pull everyone to play poker, texas holdem. I tried suiting the rest by forcing myself to watch whatever channel show they were watching, but my mood got even worse, so i decided to go take my deck of cards and play poker, or teach those who dunno how to play. I did exactly that, and soon after one round of poker, huimin walked away. Initially i thought she did not like the game play of poker, so i continued playing. When we were walking to the mrt, huimin told me that she thinks that i am a 'gambler'. The moment i heard that, i initially felt hurt and soon the anger started building inside me. She actually dared to say such a crude and dashing statement to me, i was totally taken aback! I continued walking a distance before her, just looking back once in a while, making sure that she was still walking, and that nothing would happen to her. When we reached the mrt station, we did not even say goodbye, let alone hug. So i just went by the underpass to the other side of the road to take a bus home. On the journey home, i was fuming mad at the statement she said, so i basically found it rather difficult to forgive her. I honestly meant playing poker for the benefit of the rest, cos the rest of them seemed somewhat sian too! I never expected my intentions to be wrongly interpreted. Well, we later talked that night and we shared our views and she said sorry, but i just could not bare to forgive her there and then, so i told her that i would forgive her but not at that very moment. That night i went over to Sam's place, cos i was feeling emo, so we stayed up to play poker and chat through the night. Really talked my emotions out till i got over the matter. I later msged her informing her that i had gotten over the matter and more importantly that i had forgiven her. I am thankful these events occured cos i think it makes our relationship stronger cos the bond just gets closer each time we patch issues up. yay!

The very next day, baby went shopping with her sister at VIVO and i was staying at home, waiting to go comfort Sam, who was supper depressed, till the extent that he cried to me over the phone while talking on the bus. That was when i realised that i had to do something for my best friend. So i decided to go for a run and instead of running back home, i shall make an entry into VJC to meet up with him and comfort him. Never did i expect myself to run so fast that when i reached VJC, he was still at parkway. So without anything except my mobile, he asked me to cab down to parkway. Once i reached there, faces of all his other frens, Chang Yi, Denise, Farrell, Ming Yi, were all devastating. I wondered to myself whether i was that worried for my O levels, or my PSLE, or for my upcoming end of semester results....Sam's mom managed to relate Sam's frens' results, and Ming Yi did not fare too well....thats all i can say abt them; A levels changes people in Singapore, and it sure does bring a whole load of stress along with it. Looking back now, i am just glad i did not appeal into SAJC. PHEW!!!! That evening, Sam looked for me at my place and cried again, cos he was worried that he was unable to stay in Singapore tgt with the rest of his frens and that he fears losing all these close bonding and friendship with his current buddies!!! We talked and we had dinner over at his place, got changed and went to Cafe Iguana for drinks with the rest. I was supposed to leave at 12midnight the latest, but ended up staying till 1 plus and by the time i got back, it was 2am plus, after packing my bag for my Frisbee finals, it hit 3am before i lied on my bed. The nxt morning was crazy, i was having a hang over from the previous night's drinks and i was not feeling too well. Managed to survive my first 2 games, but i was dead tired after the second one. I was sure that i would have fainted if not for all the isotonic drinks...

We lost our 3rd game, which left us at the quarter finals, so we did not manage to be winners, but on the whole, i enjoyed all the previous matches with my team buddies and i am thankful to them, though some can be tough on me at times, esp my bro, who shouts at me the most, making sure that i stay focus and alert on the game play. I am very very grateful to his help in somewhat coaching me from the sidelines....THANKS BRO! =) There was BREWERKZ beer after our match, and i stayed back for the finals, and it was sure a heart pounding final game btw two very competitive teams. In my opinion, everyone is a winner, its just how far a team is determined to win. Well, it was the team whom we lost to, cos of some smelly foul play which our captain refused to pursue, which ended us losing. Oh wells, what has passed is done and over with. I just had to say that i was so burnt from the sun that now i am suffering the withdrawal effects from having a first degree sunburn. DAMN I WAS HOT THAT NIGHT WHEN I SLEPT IN BED!!!! :DD

From the 10th to the 12th of march, my clique in school had a chalet at Coasta Sand Resort (Downtowneast). It was fun other than the fact that it rained for the first night, which affected our plans of night cycling, and there were times where some of us got into our own world of our own and some of us neglected several of our peers, and some were affected. Well, huimin had a bad mood swing, and cried cos the chalet did not turn out the way she expected it to be, but i told her, one person's actions cannot change the total outcome of the others' actions to one another. It must and should be corporative and not done individually.

(special inserts!) but i still think tht if you wna make a difference, it gta start from you! the situation din really change but i gt bettr. hah! embarrassing moments. :/

The BBQ was fun, though silly me forgot to bring the cheese, bacon, sausages, and the crabsticks, despite goin home for the satay sticks, which cost huimin $30/-, cos of some huge major accident involving an SBS bus, a car, and a huge lorry. A life was taken from that accident, and i just hope he or she was a child of GOD. Night cycling was superbly exciting and wild, we all had fun goin up and downhill, enjoying the breeze flying through our hair. I admit i did scare Amanda a lil by the way i cycled, and i sure freaked JJ out, who was my other rider in my double bike. Hahas, i was sure he was super terrified when we nearly fell off the bike when we were at Changi Village, i was actually goin downhill without any brakes, and the bike almost flipped to one side. So yeah, thankfully it held steady and we were all safe and sound by the time we reached back to our chalet, which was abt 4am in the morning. So yep, that is basically much everything of what happened over the past 3 weeks or so.....

I just met bestie, and found out that his maid nearly attempted suicide and is currently on her way back to The Philippines, and most probably not returning back to Singapore. Sam's parents are actually gonna pay him to do the household chores, cos they partly dun wanna employ anymore maids, and also bcos they wanna see whether he is capable to be independent if he goes overseas to study. In exchange for doin the household chores, he was granted his wish to go overseas for a short trip with his guy pals, to Phuket...which i think is totally reasonable. I think he would do well, esp in the kitchen!!!

Ohhh, and he just told me the truth btw him and the one he likes. The dirty lil secret has finally been shared among one another!!! (HEHHEHHEH) ALL THE BEST BRO! Until my nxt post, i think its goodbye for now!!!